After about six months in that position, I felt this lack of something. I felt like I needed to be "doing more" but I had no clue as to what that "more" constituted. I had completed all work related tasks and then some beyond the expectations yet I still felt like I was falling short in, I guess my purpose, in life. Now that's not to say that I felt like my purpose in life was to sit behind a desk, answer phones and file, not to demean anyone who does this for a living because we wouldn't be able to function without those people in the world, but rather I felt like I could be doing something in addition to the desk job.
So I started a business venture of my own and sold "adult relationship enhancement" products. I would carry around a suitcase of product and travel to homes where I would persuade people to buy the schtuff I was peddling. I made money but I didn't really recoup my costs and then corporate changed their policies so that I had to build a "downline" which in other words made it seem more like a pyramid scheme and I quickly ended that business.
Then I had a thought, well I was working at a community college, I was qualified to teach courses at that level, why not apply for a job and see where it went. Long story short I started with one course and over the past three and a half years took on more and more courses and applied at more and more places to teach realizing that I could simply go back to the academic schedule that I had become so accustomed to when I was a student. Three and a half years, many, MANY miles on the car and a desire to be settled later, has lead me back to my current employment situation which is teaching the equivalent of 6-8 courses per term and I couldn't picture my self doing anything else for the rest of my working life. :)
As I have successfully made it through the first week of the term, I settle in for another exciting term of arguments, speeches, papers, and excuses and that's just from me not to mention all of the above from my students. My own personal goal each term is to learn something. Well more specifically, I want to learn a few somethings:
- Learn something about my students, more than just their names, which I try to learn all by the end of week three.
- Learn something about me as a person. It doesn't matter what but I want to discover something.
- Learn something about my abilities in the classroom as a teacher. Usually this doesn't come until later in the term, once I get the evaluations back from the previous term, so I kind of play catch up with that one.
With that said, Paytan, my two year old, has learned a few new things. I forget that she is a that tender age when she wants to explore the world around her and soaks everything up like a sponge. I mean everything! Over Christmas we spent the holidays in Sun River, Oregon. Heading over the pass we were required to put chains on our Escape. In digging them out of the back end, a bunch of presents fell out of the car into the snow and I proceeded to shout SHIT! I look up and hear a tiny "shit" from the back seat and then see my loving husband snickering to himself in the reflection the rear view mirror. A similar incident occured while in Sun River when my dad spilled a glass of wine on the carpet and proceeded to yell SHIT and yet again Paytan chimed in with her own little "shit."
Don't worry, I know some if not most of you are thinking that I am solely teaching my daughter to speak like a pirate but that's not all I am teaching her. The past weekend in fact she learned how to play Go Fish, which took some time and patience from both of us and well as learning how to play Hop Scotch. I felt that her natural ability to jump all over the house like a frog should be harnessed into something that was a bit more organized so we put here letter/shape mat together and ran it down the hall way for hours of hopping fun!
Here is a little video of the adventure:
